(Becoming Your Best Self Series—Part 1)
Who are you?
Who do you want to be?
There’s seemingly no simple way to answer those questions. We spend our lives in pursuit of doing better, being better, and finding perfect happiness and success. We ride the wave of excitement at the thought of becoming our ideal self… then we ride the wave back down with disappointment because we’ve tried and failed once again.
The good news is that it’s possible to change no matter how many times you’ve failed in the past. You just haven’t yet found your answer to becoming the ideal, incredible person you know you were meant to be.
You Can Have It All
(but maybe not all at once...)
The truth is that we’re all striving for something better and something more, no matter how much success we’ve had in life. The difference is that some already have access to the power of awareness and the ability to transform themselves as they grow and learn.
You can have that too. You can get much closer to achieving the dreams you have for yourself than you are right now. Does it seem impossible? It’s not—it’s just that you haven’t had the right tools and mindset before now.
Sure, you’ve tried to transform yourself in the past. You’ve tried to make changes and do better and be better. So far, though, it hasn’t worked. You’re stuck with the same habits and patterns you’ve always had. You’re left to wonder how all the successful, happy people do it. How are they able to achieve their goals and you can’t?
What if I told you I have a method that will finally give you the tools you need, even if you’ve failed in the past? What if you could completely change your life and everything you know to be true, transforming yourself into whatever it is you want to be?
The fact is that your current habits and patterns are holding you back. The things you think about yourself and believe about yourself are holding you hostage–no matter how many self-help books you read or how badly you want to change. It can’t happen if you don’t have the “secret sauce.”
What Do You Believe To Be True?
The way life appears to you and treats you is based on your beliefs about the world. If you want to change, you have to change your beliefs and the way you think, feel, and act. You have to investigate faulty patterns in your life that may stem from childhood and beyond. Your thoughts patterns provide clues as to what you believe.
We’re going to spend a lot of time focusing on and breaking down the illusion of the world you’ve created for yourself. That’s right—a lot of what you believe to be true is based on your own interpretation or perception. If you believe the world is out to get you, it is or if you believe you’re a lazy good-for-nothing, you are. If you truly believe you’re strong, powerful, and successful, you most certainly are.
"The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe." -Albert Einstein
You’re going to change your mindset, patterns, and even your brain for the better. Your brain is very elastic. You can physically change how your brain works by giving yourself certain experiences, strengthening your mind and drive, and making a conscious effort to change your patterns.
Chart a New Path for Yourself
You’re walking a certain path right now. It’s not ideal for you and you’re not getting to where you really want to go. But the path is well worn and it’s easy-going. It’s comfortable, too, because it’s so familiar and non-threatening. It’s simply what you’re used to.
But you envision a better path, leading to things that excite you even just thinking about them. You sometimes make a feeble effort to quickly get to that other path, but you’re always pulled back to this one. You now believe you’re tied to your current path by an invisible, magnetic force and that it’s impossible to leave it. The other path seems too good to be true anyway.
I’m going to have you get out your hatchet, weed whacker, and ‘invisible magnet destroyer’ to cut a whole new path. You’re going to figure out what your new path looks like and you’re going to stop at nothing to get there. This path is going to take you to everything you dream of having, being, and doing.
This path is going to take you in new directions and lead you to exactly where you want to go. You’re going to protect this new path with the best actions, emotions, and reactions so you can handle whatever life throws in your way.
It might be uncomfortable at first, but if you commit yourself to this new path, you’ll feel great about leaving that old path behind. This is what you were meant to be.
Now your brain can form new connections and you can give yourself new experiences that reinforce the new beliefs you have and the relationship you want with the world. You’re going to eliminate poor patterns of days gone by.
It’s time to make it happen. Commit yourself to the process and you’ll see major changes in your life. You’ll be able to reach a level of success you’ve only dreamed about before.
Are You In Control?
Do you feel like you’re in control of your life? If you’re like many people, then you don’t feel in control at all or maybe only partially in control. There are a million obstacles in your way. You’re angry with yourself for continuing to do the things you wish you could change.
You feel like you’re in too deep. You have big dreams and goals, but you’ve failed to accomplish them over and over again. You have this vision of who you want to be and who you should be, but you continually fail to reach that ideal. You’re sinking instead of swimming.
It’s time to finally make that happen. You’re going to be in control.
You’re about to Make Some Major Changes
You’re going to change your belief system. You’re going to figure out how your emotions and beliefs are formed. You’re going to change your habits and patterns and create new beliefs about yourself and about the world that are much more constructive than the ones you have now.
Once you’ve changed your beliefs, you’ll be better able to handle anything life throws at you.
It doesn’t matter how old or young you are. If you’re willing to change, you can change. It doesn’t matter how many times you’ve tried and failed in the past… you can change.
Those people who seemingly have it all together and who already live their ideal life simply have different beliefs about themselves and the world and have developed better habits. You’re going to be able to do the same.
Following Through
It’s very easy to believe that you want to change in the beginning. But people often fall short when it comes to doing the actual work of it. It’s the “New Year’s Resolution Syndrome.”
Some people seem to be fairly adaptable. They decide to change or do something better, then they work hard to achieve it. Others know they should change and really want to but aren’t as motivated to follow through as they wish they were.
The fact is that you’re lying to yourself. Subconsciously or consciously, you’re telling yourself that changing is too scary. You’re comfortable the way you are, even if you know it’s not your ideal self.
You might actually feel bad for accomplishing change, quickly reverting back to old patterns because you feel like you aren’t being true to yourself or to others.
If that happens, it’s because you haven’t changed what you believe about yourself.
If you believe that you’re someone who constantly tries new things and fails at them, you will subconsciously make sure that happens every time. It’s not until you change your beliefs, emotional strength, actions, and reactions that you can successfully change.
For instance, if you don’t believe that you deserve to earn $100,000 per year, but you somehow achieve it, you will most likely end up losing or wasting that money, earn less the next year, or punish yourself in some other way. It’s all because the effort you made to change and succeed did not line up with what you believe about yourself.
On the other hand, if you believe that you’re destined to become a successful businessperson, earning more than $200,000 per year, and you take the right actions to achieve it, you will succeed… and it’s not because of a different set of skills or external circumstances. Your internal beliefs and processes match up and make it inevitable.
We’re going to do a lot of work on changing your beliefs and the way you approach yourself and the world. We’re going to eliminate negative beliefs you have about yourself that you may have held for years. Your beliefs have been shaped by your experiences, emotions, and mindset at the time of the experience. This has created patterns of action and reaction that are always at work in your life.
If you can change the most harmful, impactful, limiting beliefs about yourself, you’ll be able to achieve so much more. You’ll be able to decide exactly who you are and transform yourself in any way you want.
You Are Responsible for You
Some people tend to blame themselves for every little thing that happens, even if it’s not really their fault. Other people tend to blame external factors for everything that happens, even for things that really are their fault. Which pattern describes you?
The fact is that you have to take personal responsibility without blaming and criticizing yourself. For every experience you have, acknowledge the experience and the role you played in it. Take responsibility for the things that happen in your life, both good and bad.
Observe these things and really think about what they mean. If you’re deep in debt and have a failing business, that’s your responsibility, but it doesn’t define you as a person. It’s time for you to take responsibility to succeed as the person you want to be.
Successful Transformation Happens to Those Who Work for It
I’m not going to promise you that all you have to do is push a button and you’ll be successful. There are other books and courses out there that tell you they have a magic formula that will instantly transform your life. It just doesn’t happen that way.
Think of someone who’s living what you consider to be the ideal life. This person might be someone you emulate and hold up as a model for the way you want to be. They didn’t achieve their life by magic or with a secret formula. They worked on themselves or on their business consistently.
You’re going to need to work consistently to do the same. You’re going to change your beliefs, take the next right step, commit yourself to personal transformation, and reap the rewards that will come along with being your ideal self.
Keep pushing yourself no matter what happens. You can change, even if you’ve tried many times without success before. It’s time to make it happen. This is it—this is the moment you decide to change for the better in a way that will last forever.
In the next edition, we will explore "Who You Are Right Now".
Until then, many blessings and much peace!